Honey,
Nice to see you’re back. I wanted to fill you in on a few things around the apartment now that you’re here.
It’s true that there are now small piles of pine needles from the Christmas tree in every room. While this wasn’t intentional, it adds a fresh scent and holiday feel to the apartment that I think was lacking. Add a little cinnamon and it can smell like Christmas in here until at least March.
I may have overestimated my ability to clean out the fridge. While you’re right to notice that I have eaten everything in it, I didn’t find the time to do the promised scrub. This brings up another point. Whatever automated system to we have that refills the fridge with food seems to have broken down in your absence. Do you know how this works? I couldn’t figure it out for the life of me and resorted to take out once it was clear that the fridge was staying empty.
I also wanted to see if you could help me track down the source of the pervasive smell of used gym clothes in our bedroom. You have a much keener sense of smell than I do and I just can’t tell where it’s coming from.
The bathroom… Yes, best not to speak of it. However, the good news is that most of the pine needles are out of the tub. Just kick the rest towards the drain and they’ll take care of themselves.
I have no idea who ordered that pay per view.
Love ya.